Monday, March 26, 2012

New Life + New Seasons + Faith

I love Spring. It signifies a season of New Life. Jesus says, "Behold, I make all things new." (Revelation 21:5)

This Spring signifies a new beginning for me.

The last couple months, I have been "crying out in the wilderness" for help, for guidance, for wisdom to know the next step. Forgive the frankness of the words, but it's as though I've experienced living "hell on earth." I found myself sobbing for Jesus to help. "Help" was all I could cry out. It was as though my soul was being crumpled, shriveled, trampled on as nothing. My physical health was going down hill, due to the stress.

I knew it was time to take some action.

It was time to to move out and get a place of my own.

Not to run away from my circumstances (because, in a way, these specific circumstances will always be apart of who I am), but to run to hope, help, and healing found in Jesus ... to leave all that is considered "safe" in order to follow Jesus and to be able to become fully who He wants me to be.

As I looked at apartments & townhouses and then looked at my finances (and the lack of substancial income coming in) I got discouraged.

I began to pray and ask the Lord to provide for my needs. HE can do such marvelous things!

One afternoon, I got a phone call from someone in my church, and they offered me their basement bedroom to rent out from April 1st to August 1st. I was ever so grateful for the offer, but I knew that in time, additional income would be needed to be able to afford rent... and groceries.

Two days later, after my church's evening service (we have both morning & evening services) someone approached me and asked if I could nanny their six year old daughter from May to August. Immedietely tears came to my eyes and all I could do was cry. WHAT an answer to prayer! This nanny job will only be 3-5 minutes down the road from where I'll be living for the next four months. Infact, I could probably save my car's gasoline & just walk to work! Aaand, I'll have Mondays off, in additional to Saturday & Sunday, leaving time for me to still devote to my photography business.

Who could have provided & orchestrated in such a way but God? He is truly Father to the fatherless, and I DO stand in awe of Jesus. He knows what we need & He is more than able to supply for those needs.

Last week, if you would've told me that THIS week, I would be packing up my belongings and moving by next week, I wouldn't have believed you.

My rent at this place will be up in August, and I am trusting that the Lord will again provide & give me wisdom where to move after that & where to look for rent next... and that He will provide the finances necessary.

We serve a big God, and I stand in awe of Jesus.

"Behold, I am doing a new thing; now it springs forth, do you not perceive it?
I will make a way in the wilderness and rivers in the desert." —Isaiah 43:19 ESV


Anonymous said...

God will continue to provide if it's His will for you to live/stay there :)
I'm sorry to hear your life has been rough lately... I hope you are on good terms with family. They will always love you no matter what!

Rachel said...

This post really relates to the one above about leaving home as a single young woman. Some of the most encouraging stories of God's provision that I have ever heard are from my 40-year-old friend who is unmarried and just moved from home a couple years ago. It is hard for her but so GOOD to see God provide!

JCR said...

Just reading through your old blog posts, catching up and this one particularly spoke to me.
That part about "living hell on earth", I too have experienced. A kind of pain (and stress!)that only Jesus can be a balm for, nothing else is strong enough.